Flying Armadillo Syndrome (FAS)
General Information:
June, the very first month of winter, here in Camelalot is well known for the migration of the blue-spotted iguana, travelling south in the hopes of finding unfrozen Mint Slice. This annual event, whilst spectacular, is of concern to medical practitioners such as myself.
The Igaunas steadily traipsing south is a delightful spectacle, and as such, certainly well worth the interest of all Camelalottians. However, this year, word has reached us that the Iguanas may be carrying the deadly Flying Armadillo Syndrome. Thus anyone suffering a bite from the ill-tempered creatures may be in peril.
Flying Armadillo Syndrome (FAS) is characterised by a pink and green rash across the distribution of the vena cava, hepatomegaly, and mental disturbances. These particularly concern a persistant belief that the patient is an armadillo, and can fly. In addition, fasiculations may also be present in arm muscles, presumably because the patient believes they are wings.
The long term consequences of FAS are coma and eventual death, within a week, due to sudden and catastrophic liver failure. However, usually patients will perish prior to this, usually in falls from roofs or play equipment as they attempt to fly around the back yard.
Fortunately, a simple and easy vaccine is available for this disease. It is available for free*, here in downtown Camelalot, at my practise. After one simple injection, you will be free to see the iguanas in perfect health!
IF YOU OR ANY OF YOUR FAMILY EXPERIENCE THE FOLLOWING SYMPTOMS, SEEK MEDICAL ADVICE IMMEDIATLY:
Pink and Green Rash
Sudden belief you are an armadillo
Sudden belief you can fly
This has been a Doctor Satan announcement
*Note: Free only with the provision of soul
(Hey Bun, Kayt, Flit and other mod types. As the new pigeon on the powerline, I'm still not too sure exactly what I can get away with. If this is not appropriate, delete away! I won't be offended.**
**Note: I may cry [img]http://s3.images.proboards.com/tongue.gif" alt=":P" border="0"/>
Indeed, I think it's perfect! - Bunne.